Truth be told, any relationship with an ex firmly in the picture, due to child custody, financial complications and predicaments, residential proximity, is a potential trap that should be bypassed with as much vigor as one can possibly demonstrate. The rates of remarriages are rather high, it is nothing special these days. And more often than not these new families are hiding a skeleton in the closet, represented by the memories of the ex-wife or the ex-husband or the relationship with either of them, caused by living circumstances. Here are a few guidelines how to deal with this situation, if you ever decide to join a Russian mail order brides site again and look for another Russian bride.
You need to determine upfront if your new Russian bride has an emotional stress related to the previous marriage and the subsequent divorce. Furthermore, you should check yourself for the same, in order to safeguard your psychological well-being. If you are dating a new Russian lady and she keeps mentioning her former husband, even in seemingly remote circumstances, it should ring an alarm bell for you – she is still lingering in her past and cannot let it go. Reminiscing about the past has nothing wrong about it, but in this case it is overlapping with the present and can create insurmountable complications in the future. Of course the best advice in such a situation would be to make bygones be bygones, as they say.
You future needs to be uncluttered, in this respect the past should not be just forgotten, it is impossible to do that, but the physical connection to this pre-divorce past should be brought to the absolute minimum. Every issue of the previous marriage should be dealt with before you embark on another relationship. A divorce usually leaves a huge scar on people’s mind and soul, it takes time for the wounds to heal, sometimes a lot of time. All the financial entanglements with former spouses should be resolved well in advance to minimize their possible damage in the future. The slate should be made clean for the new relationship and commitment.
According to the psychological study “Divorce impact on our future life”, carried out on May 23, 2014 in New York, if you wake up in the morning and think about your ex at least once in ten days, you are still not ready for a new relationship. Some people don’t experience a lot of psychological pain after a divorce, but in most cases the past keeps lingering in their thoughts and doesn’t let go easily.
What to do to forget her quicker
You are ready to pursue a relationship after a divorce and are eager to begin dating a Russian bride again? If this decision of yours is being taken consciously and if your determination beats all other negative factors, here is what is advisable to do in such a situation:
- Check how often you think about your ex. There is no strict criteria regarding this, but you must bear in mind that the more you think about your ruined marriage, the less self-confident you will be, and it is bound to affect your new relationship in a rather drastic way;
- Don’t store the pictures with your ex and other former marriage related paraphernalia. I know it sounds cruel, but here is the best way to deal with it – throw every object that reminds you of her into a garbage container;
- Discuss this issue with your new lady whom you are dating now. Together you may be able to work out the best approach that suits your unique situation. Marriages fall apart due to a zillion of reasons, and the aftershocks of a divorce should be curbed by developing trust between you and your new sweetheart.